Miscommunications Elsewhere

My friend Lucy is currently living in Azerbaijan working in the Peace Corp, and I thought you all might enjoy an email she sent today. It seems that her daily miscommunications are a bit more extreme than mine, and equally, if not more, entertaining.

From Lucy:

I hopped on the bus the other morning on my way to the local movie theatre. Opening the door to the marshrutka (mar sh root ka or mini-bus) for my neighbor she took an uncomfortably close seat next to me and said (all in Azeri mind you)

“Where is your baby?”

To which I replied, “I don’t have a baby.”

Looking a little perturbed, she stated, “Yes you do,” and asked again, “Where is your baby?”

Second-guessing my language skills a bit I took a moment to translate the sentence in my head and reevaluate my current family situation. Upon feeling confident that I was indeed without child, and correct in my answer, I replied again, “I don’t have a baby.”

Her face scrunched up in a manner that suggested she’d ask the question again, but instead she cocked her head to the side and said to me, “You have very nice eyebrows.”

Feeling more confused than ever and taking an even longer pause to translate, I then replied,  “Thanks,” secretly hoping this conversation was over.

Alas, I was wrong. And she followed my reply with her original query, “So, where is your baby?”

At this point I saw my stop approaching and so I threw 20qapik (ga peak, like cents) at the driver and yelled to the woman, much to the entertainment of the rest of the bus I’m sure,

“I don’t have a baby!”

After telling my story of the oddest encounter I’ve had to date quite a few times, it was later discovered that in fact my translations were correct and that plucked eyebrows are a sure sign of marriage in Azerbaijan. And if I’ve taught you anything you’re already thinking, well, marriages in Azerbaijan = what?

Correct! 

Babies!